Cruz has swag

Well here's a post I never thought I'd be writing - Cruz has gained some notoriety this week all because of a picture I submitted to a blog. A couple of weeks ago my cousin Jude emailed me, telling me to check out this adorable blog, Children With Swag and suggested I submit a picture of Cruz. I thought it was a fun idea so I decided to take some photos of him. I dressed him in this super cute, preppy little outfit that I bought at H&M (I am obsessed with their kid's clothes) for him to wear on Easter. I finished the look with a hat that he got from my friend Violeta on his last birthday. He looked so handsome I was getting giddy just taking his picture!

I submitted the photo to Children With Swag and to my delight, they posted it late that same evening. Even though it's a simple blog with nothing but photos, I felt every bit the proud mama seeing his picture posted. The photo has been re-blogged multiple times and I'm still a little surprised that so many people enjoy it. The following morning I received two emails - one was from the editor of the blog, asking permission to include Cruz's picture in a collection of photos that she's planning to publish on Huffington Post! The second email was from an editor at cbsnews.com, also asking for permission to use Cruz's picture. Today he sent me the link to the feature on cbsnews.com about kids with style.

How cool is that? Wait till Cruz grows up and I can show him what a trendsetter he was at 3 years old!

Valentine's Day

Since Randy and I have been together since (gulp) high school, we've run through the gamut of Valentine's Day gifts. We finally figured out that we were tired of drinking the Hallmark kool-aid and didn't enjoy how commercialized the day had become. We decided that moving forward, it would be more about time spent together rather than stuffed animals or heart-shaped boxes of chocolate. Suddenly the holiday became so much more fun as each year we chose fun things to do together: a trip to the Monterey Bay Aquarium, watching the Phantom of the Opera, having dinner on the Napa Valley Wine train. It is so much more rewarding to spend Valentine's Day creating memories than just exchanging cheesy gifts!

Now that we're parents I want to pass this on to my kids - Valentine's Day should be a day to celebrate love and those we care about in a fun way. This is the first year that Cruz sort of understands what Valentine's Day is and I noticed that he associates the heart shape with the holiday. I thought it would be fun to use the heart theme for a Valentine's Day dinner for Randy and Cruz. But first, since Cruz eats breakfast at daycare, I made him his favorite blueberry muffins but this time heart-shaped:

For dinner I made "Love Pasta" with adorable pink and white heart-shaped pasta that I found at World Market.

I served it on festive plates from Target that now we can use every year.

Cruz is his mother's son and loves chocolate so I made brownies and cut them out into hearts, and served them with strawberry ice cream.

Despite being simple, every day kind of food, making everything heart shaped made it look and feel special. I had so much fun making this meal for my family and I think they enjoyed it too. I always say "food is love"...Valentine's Day or not!

My 3 Valentines:

Return to Civilization

Maternity leave has come to an end...I returned to the office yesterday, although I began sending Lucas to daycare at the beginning of the week to get him acclimated. Despite this being my second go-round with sending a child to daycare, it was still bittersweet and I missed having his warm little body constantly at my side the first two days. That being said, there is a part of me that welcomes the "return to civilization" and the part of my life that is solely ME. I relish having a career which I enjoy, coworkers who are friends, and a space where I can learn and feel challenged mentally. Don't get me wrong, there are days where I sit in my cubicle and miss my kids terribly, and feel like I am a bad mother for not being there to raise them every minute of the day. There are nights where I watch them sleep, lamenting that they are bigger than they were the day before, and wondering whether I gave them enough attention in the few hours between coming home and bedtime. Despite those moments of insecurity, I know that in the grand scheme of things I am doing what is right for myself and for my family.

It is an interesting experience going back to work after maternity leave, particularly the first time. You come back to the office and it's like nothing there has changed, yet you are an entirely different person. I think motherhood actually changes your outlook on work (and life in general) for the better. Motherhood is the ultimate Project Management position! You become super-efficient, prioritize like a pro and power through your to-do list despite sleeping in 15-minute increments the night before. My personal acquired skill: I can do anything one-handed...seriously, ANYTHING.

Joking aside, your life completely changes when you bring that little baby into the world. When you are tasked with nurturing and caring for another life, you quickly realize what really matters in life. And the truth is, not much matters except for your health and the people you love. Emails, deadlines and petty office coworkers quickly fade to gray and merely become background noise to your life. Motherhood has taught me how to appreciate life and how to let go of the things that I cannot control.I have a second chance in life to find joy in the little and big things. Motherhood isn't for everyone, but I am grateful for the opportunity.

An A for Effort

Somehow, somewhere, the Parenting Gods were smiling down on us because we were fortunate enough to avoid the dreaded Terrible Twos with Cruz. He's just a few months shy of turning 4 and we have never had to deal with tantrums, kicking, screaming or public meltdowns (still knocking on wood). He has proven to be a level-headed kid that can be reasoned with, and will usually go along with whatever we say as long as he is provided an explanation. Despite his easy disposition, we knew it was still important to discipline him as he grew older.

Both Randy and I grew up in families where parents were the ultimate authorities. They were never questioned, talked back to or disrespected. Even when they were unreasonable or unfair, their word was the final say and there was nothing that could be done about it. Growing up I vowed to be more lenient and "cooler" than my parents. As we all know, hindsight is always 20/20. Even in my short 3 1/2 years as a parent, I already realize the value of being the authority in your child's life and demanding their obedience and respect. When they are toddlers, it provides structure for their developing minds and gives them a framework for their broadening worlds. As teenagers, it allows parents to keep a tight rein on hormonal adolescents who think they are invincible. That being said, I'm not aspiring to be the next Tiger Mother, but I do want my children to grow up being accountable for their actions and knowing that there are consequences their behavior choices.

I got a great tip from my friend Violeta, a child psychiatrist, who suggested using a behavior chart to begin teaching Cruz. I downloaded some blank templates to use for Cruz. There are 5 spaces to list out the child's daily tasks/expectations. Here are Cruz's tasks for this week:

1. Say "please" and "thank you"
2. Put away toys every night
3. No interrupting when other people are talking
4. Feed myself at dinner
5. Stay in my seat at dinner

At the end of each day, Randy or I review each of Cruz's tasks with him, and decide whether he accomplished them. For each successfully completed task, he gets a star. If he receives at least 3 stars (a majority) that day, he is awarded with a special sticker (these run the gamut of cars, trucks,and food - all of which he helped pick out).

This continues for the whole week, and at the end of the week, if Cruz accumulates at least 4 special stickers (again, a majority) he gets to choose a reward from the prize box!

We are only 4 days into our first behavior chart and we've already seen an improvement with Cruz. He knows that we'll be checking to see if he picked up his toys or stayed in his seat at dinner, and that's enough for him to make an effort so that he earns a star. Violeta mentioned that not all children respond well to the behavior chart because it's a delayed reward system, but luckily it has struck a chord with Cruz. I am so proud of my little guy and how hard he tries to do the right thing...I'm a lucky mommy!